Oct 26
“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin
When you measure your life in each day, your birthday is just another day to celebrate the abundance of gifts and blessings with gratitude. Happy Day! And Amen.
“It takes a long time to become young.” – Pablo Picasso
Oct 22
“When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.” – Gilbert K. Chesterton
“The hardest thing to see is what is in front of your eyes.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
What do you see? Clouds or blue sky? What we move to the forefront defines our landscape, our path. We all have our days when the clouds win. But days turn into weeks, into years, into a life time. The most important people, moments, gifts become the backdrop, unnoticed as we search for something that is right in front of us. The scenery goes unseen. Wake up everyday and choose the blue sky. No more lost time, no more regrets. Make the blue sky the forefront and let the clouds fall back where they belong.
Sep 15
“No one who achieves success does so without acknowledging the help of others. The wise and confident acknowledge this help with gratitude.” – Alfred North Whitehead
“The language of friendship is not words but meanings.” – Henry David Thoreau
Yesterday, I ran the Bear Water Run, the last long run before the Twin Cities marathon three weeks from today. They offered a 10 and 20 mile option, twice around White Bear Lake. Lined up with a few hundred others, I thought of the training runs I did by myself to get me to this last long run. It was encouraging to be with others on the same journey with their own stories. A few blocks in to the run, my brother John and sister-in-law Tina were on bikes waiting to follow along, checking in every few miles.
As I was approaching the end of the first 10 mile lap around the lake, I thought of 2004 when I ran this event for my first marathon training. I had IT band injury from running on uneven pavement, so I was concerned if I would even finish the 20 miler. As I turned the corner for the first 10 miles, Dad was standing there to make sure I was ok. He came back at the end of the run too.
Learning the lessons from my first marathon, I felt much better after the first 10 miles yesterday. Anna then joined me for the second 10 miles lap around the lake. She pulled me along with her fresh legs, conversation and walking with me when the toll of the hills started to work on my knees and ankles. When we were two miles out, putting it all in a bite-sized perspective, she noted “only 20 minutes left”, then 10 minutes, one mile left. She even let me finish a step ahead of her. When we were at a the “you finished” lunch (beer) with Mom, Dad, John, Tina and Anna, the texts messages came rolling in from friends checking to see how I did.
In our daily life, we can often feel like we are alone, doing the “long runs” by ourselves. Yesterday, reminded me that we are never alone. Life is a team sport. We need only look up and around and see the gifts of family and friends – our cheering section, running along our side, making the journey complete.
Sep 12
“Grief can take care if itself, but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.” – Mark Twain
Every morning, Lily wakes up with enthusiasm and delight, forgetting yesterday and not fretting tomorrow. She jumps on the bed, puts her head down, butt in the air and flops on me and begins rolling around.
Lately, there aren’t many people who model delight and excitement. We tend to become that which we are surrounded by. So the struggle is to stay positive and avoid catching “the cold” of the “busy and downtrodden.” Lack of civility and empathy never improves our circumstances. Abundance trumps scarcity.
So once again, Lily and Molly reteach me the lesson of enjoying the day and bringing that joy to others. I don’t hit that mark every moment or day, but it’s what I aspire to and will focus on. Love life and it will love you back. Dread life and suddenly dread appears. Take the stance of joy and remember to drop, flop and roll around in it.
“A good stance and posture reflect a proper state of mind.” – Morihei Ueshiba
Aug 26
One of my favorite plays is Our Town by Thornton Wilder, who in the author’s own words describes it as “an attempt to find a value above all price for the smallest events in our daily life.”
The stage manager narrates throughout. In the third act, the character Emily has died and she’s talking with others in the town who have died. Against their advice, she wants to go back to one day in her life, her twelfth birthday. The stage manager let’s her know that “you will not only live it, you will watch yourself live it.”
After watching the day unfold, she wants to leave and go back.
Emily: “I can’t go on. It goes so fast. We don’t have time to look at one another. . . I didn’t realize. So all that was going on and we never noticed. . . Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? – every, every minute?”
Stage manager: “No.” Pause “The saints and poets, maybe, they do some.”
Notice today, every, every minute. See people, look into their eyes, and your own. Poets and saints.
Jun 30
“I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.” – Leonardo da Vinci
At a funeral service for a family friend, a few of family members reflected on a life well-lived filled with laughter, tears, inside jokes, little moments. Loyal, generous, kind, gentle – principles lived out each day.
What will they say about what you left behind? Move through each day keenly aware of the brevity and gift of life and your capacity and duty to make a positive, loving and lasting impact while you’re here. What will they say? You’re writing it each day in your thoughts, words and actions.
Jun 26
“Love is our true destiny. We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone – we find it with another.” – Thomas Merton
My parents drove up to Duluth early Saturday morning to surprise my brother at the finish of his first marathon. With great anticipation, we waited in the rain for him to turn the final corner. Cameras ready and cow bells ringing, Tina, Emily and I were cheering to get his attention and then pointed out Mom and Dad. John’s mouth dropped and he stopped in his tracks to embrace Dad. Emily brilliantly captured the moment, summing it all up.
Family, friends, love, unwavering support, being there in the rain to celebrate our wins, easing the heavy steps all make the long race possible and meaningful. The finishing touch to the journey well traveled, never alone.
“At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.” – Plato
May 27
“Wisdom begins in wonder.” – Socrates
“Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.” – William Butler Yeats
This weekend, we celebrated my nephew Mark’s graduation from college. Next weekend, we celebrate my niece Emily’s graduation from high school, proud moments, wonderful life transitions and milestones. Twenty seven years ago, I graduated from college and am reminded vividly that time passes by both slowly and quickly all at once. If I could go back and give my 27 year younger self some advice as well as Mark and Emily, here are a few thoughts that come to my mind and heart:
While this part of your education is over, school has just begun. Be curious, ask questions and you will learn every day. And to my 27 year older self, that youthful optimism and enthusiasm remains within, a bit bruised from the journey, but stronger for it.
May 12
“A garden requires patient labor and attention. Plants do not grow merely to satisfy ambitions or to fulfill good intentions. They thrive because someone expended effort on them.” – Liberty Hyde Bailey
“Genius is childhood recalled at will.” – Charles Baudelaire
It is quite simple. We find the extraordinary in the ever so ordinary moments in our life. Never underestimate the power of playing catch, swinging at the playground, going for a walk hand in hand, watching a baseball game, sharing an ice cream cone. Above all other seemingly important endeavors, time spent with your kids, parents, family, and friends in words and silence is time well-spent. The richness and depth of our life is defined by what we pay attention to so choose well. Joy is ours to capture daily in the ordinary moments.
May 11
“If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” – Mother Teresa
Our family is the first place we discover a sense of belonging. From here we go out into the world and invite others into our lives, to be in relationship, expanding the circle. Moms teach and model unconditional love, proving that it’s possible in this world.
On Mother’s Day and everyday, in addition to my Mom, I am grateful for all of the special women in my life – sister, sister-in-law, aunts, nieces, cousins and girlfriends, whether they are a Mom or not. They have shown me how to love and be loved. Happy Mother’s Day to women everywhere who make life softer and sweeter, those still with us and those who are gone but remain ever present in our hearts. It’s good to belong.
“Intense love does not measure, it just gives.” – Mother Teresa
