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Posts tagged ‘Friends’

Nov 2

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Bliss

“Nothing is more important than reconnecting with your bliss. Nothing is as rich. Nothing is more real.” – Deepak Chopra

Our life must be more than lists, tasks and the race to what’s next.  As we complicate our life with busyness in hot pursuit of who knows what, it is always the simple moments and encounters that bring us back to our best self, to meaning and joy, to our bliss.

Get off the rollercoaster and get grounded in what is calling to you. We all have it. That quiet voice, the gut feeling, the longing where our spirit and soul resides waiting to be released, to play and dance.

We need not know the end of the story. Write a sentence at a time and the story unfolds through the risk of movement leading us to our true north. Start with one word, a new thought, a simple act, a shift in perspective.

With practice and presence, the mundane transforms to marvelous, laughter to gratitude, simplicity to depth. We become masters of life through practice, ups and downs, wins and losses, work and most important, play.

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” – Joseph Campbell

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” – Joseph Campbell

 

Oct 4

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The Mettle Behind the Medal

“You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand.” – Woodrow Wilson

This is one of my favorite weekends – the Twin Cities Marathon weekend, a tradition. I ran my first marathon at 39 years old in 2004. My last two marathons were the Twin Cities Marathon in 2013 and 2014. Last year may have been my last marathon, but I’m not committing to not committing at this point. This year, I ran the Twin Cities 10 mile with Jeanne, Linda and Terry. Three strips of tape wrapped tight around my lame ankle makes running doable but at times questionable.

Every runner has a story, a battle, a challenge, but they show up just the same to finish the sentence, the paragraph, the chapter of their journey. I’ve never been fast, but stubborn and persistent fit pretty well. And fortunately, I surround myself with some of the same.

“For a gallant spirit there can never be defeat.” – Wallis Simpson

“For a gallant spirit there can never be defeat.” – Wallis Simpson

Today, there was a lot of mettle behind the medals. Jeanne, a breast cancer survivor, Mom, Grandma, Cousin, confidant, friend, co-worker, a bit of an ass-kicker and so much more than she knows. Walking joy and delight, she always brings life and the party to the party.

I met Linda through Jeanne in 2004 and the three of us have traveled the last 4-5 years to half marathons throughout the country – officially forming the “sole sisters.” Linda is a Mom, personal trainer, creative jewelry maker and good friend. She has a bone floating around her knee, nothing that a bit of tape can’t hold together.

I also met Terry through Jeanne and “the running group” in 2004. We gather to run and chat on Wednesdays, Saturdays and various running events throughout the year. Terry is 77 and is more fit than most 30 somethings I know. In addition to cancer years ago, he had an ankle replacement and yet he’s still running. He has an awesome sense of humor and always has a good story worth repeating.

These are the friends that I surround myself with so some of their courage and resilience rubs off on me. I have many medals from a variety of running events throughout the years. None are more valuable than what I’ve learned and witnessed by running the runs with friends who really show the mettle behind the medal.

Oct 1

Gestures

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” – Havelock Ellis

“Life has no blessing like a prudent friend.” – Euripides

“Life has no blessing like a prudent friend.” – Euripides

Simple gestures often communicate more clearly than a thousand words. A glance, a smile, a hug speak volumes.

Our four-legged furry family members have mastered the art of gestures since it’s their only way to communicate. And perhaps that’s why they bring deep joy to our lives. They show us how to live lightly through their silliness, their ability to forget our shortcomings and love us unconditionally, their capacity for udder delight and their awareness of the present moment and all that it has to offer.

So when I need a good reminder of how to be a good friend, to be grateful for all of my blessings, to be more humane, I most often consult with Molly and Lily.

“Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.” – Khalil Gibran

“Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.” – Khalil Gibran

Be kind, gentle, forgiving, mindful of others and walk lightly through today. Your positive gestures will lift others in ways that you may never know but is so desperately needed. Cast light, warm the world.

Sep 4

Coin New Memories

“Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.” – Carl Sandburg

The Minnesota State Fair brings back wonderful memories of growing up. Every year, Grandpa would take my brother, sister and I out to the Fair. We had the same routine – machinery hill to see all of the tractors, Peter’s hot dogs in the Grandstand, the animal barns and the All You Can Drink Milk stand. We each got $10 and silver dollars, but Grandpa wouldn’t let us spend any of it. He took care of the entire day.

Today, my niece Emily and I made some new memories at the “Great Minnesota Get Together” that I hope she will remember as fondly as I remember my time with Grandpa. We biked up, visited the dog barn and grandstand, shared Sweet Martha’s cookies and strolled through the Midway where Emily threw a ping pong ball into the floating bowl to win a polka dot teddy bear. We also picked up our awesome University of Minnesota “Goldy Gopher” sun glasses and relaxed a bit on a very comfy swing.

“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.” – Horace

“Mix a little foolishness with your serious plans. It is lovely to be silly at the right moment.” – Horace

We simply spent time together, being silly, laughing and talking. The little girl that I used to dance with and sing Patsy Cline’s classic song Crazy to is suddenly a beautiful young woman starting her third year of college next week.

Life goes on whether you choose to slow down enough to witness, observe and enjoy each moment of it or not. Choose well and create new memories each day.

Jul 29

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The Whole Pie

“The thing that grounds you, and the thing that really gives you a sense of wholeness, is your family, friends and your community. Those are the things that can mirror back to you what you’re experiencing, and can affirm to you that the stories you are telling are true.” – Dan Chaon

After Sunday and Monday traveling for work with delayed flights and stuck for about 12 hours each day in airports waiting, I spent the last leg of the re-booked late Monday night flight not doing work, listening to music, watching the sun glow above the pillows of clouds as the moon entered, reflecting off the wing.

This year, I’ve traveled more for work than I have in the past three years combined. In addition, there have been a lot of family health issues and challenges – stage 4 breast cancer, Mayo Clinic trips, hip replacement, dog ACLs repairs, dog allergies and a roof replacement for 9 year old roof … and the list goes on.

Exhausted and on the verge of feeling sorry for myself, I started to scan all of the pictures on my iPad from the past seven months. And that simple exercise gave me the entire picture – vacations with friends and family, special moments, running events, a college graduation, birthdays and celebrations. I’ve got a GOOD life with wonderful people/dogs scattered through all of it.

We can easily focus on the slices of life that test our mettle, patience, faith and resolve. But when we look at the whole pie, we immediately discover the wholeness and holiness of our life. While we often don’t see it in the midst of the moment, challenges grow our soul and spirit, teaching us to let go of that which is not worthy of our desperate grip. We become more compassionate, less judgmental, more accepting, loving unconditionally and simply amazed.

When on the tipping point into the hole of self-pity, take a step back, a deep breath, be quiet, reflect and thank God for all of the blessings bestowed on us through grace alone. Life is as good as we allow it to be. Start living each day with a light heart, heavy joy and deep gratefulness. Eat the whole pie.

“Above all the grace and the gifts that Christ gives to his beloved is that of overcoming self.” – Francis of Assisi

“Above all the grace and the gifts that Christ gives to his beloved is that of overcoming self.” – Francis of Assisi

 

Jul 19

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Picking Up the Toy

“Life is always at some turning point.” – Irwin Edman

On the first trip outside this morning, Molly picked up a toy in the living room and proceeded to the back yard. She does this every morning, but this morning was special. She had surgery last Monday on a torn ACL from wear, tear and arthritis. She has about 10 inches of stitches on her inner knee and a metal plate screwed in to reconstruct the function. When I picked her up on Tuesday, she was looking pretty rough but anxious to get home.

“Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy.” – Sai Baba

“Love one another and help others to rise to the higher levels, simply by pouring out love. Love is infectious and the greatest healing energy.” – Sai Baba

She’s been pretty somber through the week, waking up, coughing, limping around, not herself. On Thursday morning, I took her back to have them check out her coughing and it turned out she has pneumonia often caused by anesthesia.

All week, Lily has been keeping an eye on her like a hawk. Patiently waiting for her best friend to feel better and be ready to play again. The toy pick up this morning signaled that Molly is feeling better and ready to bring play back. She’s coughing less and her eyes are brightening up.  She’s on the mend and I wouldn’t expect anything else from her. She’s a combination of tough and sweet with a side of attitude.

During difficult times, we often think they won’t end or it will get worse. As we move through the waiting and worrying, healing is happening, what’s next is being written, it’s all unfolding as it is meant to be. Even though it may not feel that way, it’s reassuring to know that it will be ok soon, that we’ll be able to pick up the toy again.

Jun 14

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A Breeze and a Stick

“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.” – Joseph Campbell

When walking the girls this morning with my thoughts bouncing to the week ahead and the month behind, a breeze came off the lake and for a moment I was held and engulfed, awakened to God right in the midst of the moment. Always present, never alone and gently carried whether I realize it or not.

Listen, watch and hear all that is around calling out to let us know that we are alright. A few hours later, the girls began to play with a stick. It instantly made for play and fun. A stick, a simple stick.

Enjoy each day and be open to the breezes and sticks that enter our day to call us out of our thoughts and worries into the moment. A breeze and a stick – sacred space found.

“Oh, my God, this amazing cool breeze is coming through my window and the sun is shining. I'm happy.” – Liv Tyler

“Oh, my God, this amazing cool breeze is coming through my window and the sun is shining. I’m happy.” – Liv Tyler

Jun 12

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All the Beauty

“Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.” – Anne Frank

When I ground myself in what’s important and authentic, all of the useless, draining stuff falls away. No matter what is going on, we all have the capacity and calling to smile, to laugh, to love, to transform regular moments into special memories. Lighten your load, lighten up, cast light.

“Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

“Because of your smile, you make life more beautiful.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

Jun 7

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In the Middle

“Faith is an oasis in the heart which will never be reached by the caravan of thinking.” – Khalil Gibran

Without hesitation, Lily ventures right into the middle of the grass to explore. Never worried about getting out or stuck, confident in each step she moves swiftly focused on the next step and sniff.

When I saw her amidst the foliage yesterday, it summed up the last few months. Head down, a day at a time, not seeing much past the tall grass. Quietly working my way through, knowing the path ahead is clear even if I can’t see it quite yet.

Our journey is not always understood. And as hard as we try or as fast as we may go, we can’t out think, out run or out smart it. When we release the need to know exactly what’s next, we discover that one step at a time is enough. Lift your head and peak beyond the tall grass.

“We must go beyond textbooks, go out into the bypaths and untrodden depths of the wilderness and travel and explore and tell the world the glories of our journey.” – John Hope Franklin

“We must go beyond textbooks, go out into the bypaths and untrodden depths of the wilderness and travel and explore and tell the world the glories of our journey.” – John Hope Franklin

Jun 2

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Friend

“Our friends interpret the world and ourselves to us, if we take them tenderly and truly.” – Amos Bronson Alcott

Sharon and I have been planning our 50th birthday celebration New York trip for over a year. It had to be delayed a year when life and other commitments took precedence. I took a lot of pictures of our New York adventure last week and this is one of my favorites. I am not a fan of pictures of myself but I vowed to take a “selfie” of us each day to capture the trip and be reminded long after it passed.

“Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.” – Khalil Gibran

“Let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.” – Khalil Gibran

We were at Carnegie Hall for a concert. When I checked it out to make sure my finger didn’t make its way into the picture, I saw the gal in back of us with a big smile – so we got a selfie plus. I turned around and asked her what she was doing in our selfie and we all had a big laugh about it. We saw a lot of girlfriends together on the trip.

I’ve known Sharon for over 30 years. We met at freshman orientation at the University of Minnesota. We went around the room for introductions and she said she was from a small town called Canton, South Dakota which probably wasn’t on the map and cracked up at her own joke. I thought – what a nerd. And from that day on that nerd and this nerd have been best friends.

During college, when she didn’t go home for Easter, she joined my family’s celebration and quickly became part of the family. My Dad helped her buy her first car. From calculus to Rocky’s pizza lunches to break ups to grocery shopping at midnight after a movie to her and Tim getting married and moving to New Jersey in August, 1989. I remember the moment after we packed the moving truck saying good bye and aching the loss. And then surprising her Thanksgiving that year and flying out to see her. That was the first time I went to New York when we ventured in on the train.

Even three decades later when we get together, it’s like time has not passed between the last time we saw each other. The conversation picks up as if only a moment’s silence in between.

Time passes quickly and time away with a friend or helping family through health issues are vivid reminders to focus, pay attention and invest ourselves in what’s really important.

Call an old friend, check in with a family member, make a new friend. We can’t predict what tomorrow will bring but we can be assured that change will be a main ingredient. Stay in the moment, create new moments and cherish each one as you are moving through them. Be a friend that will still connect 30 years later and laugh and love even deeper.

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